Location: India

There is so much to me, and yet i have such a longlong way to go. I am still discovering myself...everyday i will tell u something more about me

Saturday, December 17, 2005

my passion

If there is one thing which turns me on totally, that is martial arts. It makes me feel so complete. I probably get the same kick out of it which alcoholics and drug addicts do :)

The most satisfied moment i ever had and which i can vividly remember is when i once walked out of my dojo after a really hard session of eskrima (filliphino martial arts - stickfighting).

I lack stamina. I have always lacked stamina. I am probably the first one to start panting in the class or be out of breath. I cannot run too long. I never could run for long enough...the side of my stomach would start hurting.

Yet i would always be the last one to stop practise. I am sure i have a past life history with martial arts. It tunes me in. It turns me on. It makes me feel as if i am on top of the world. I feel charged. I can feel the energy flow in my body.

I remember i used to stuff daddy's old trousers in a pillow case and hang it in my balcony and practise punching them late nights screaming "ooooo" "aaaaa"...the martial art cries..till my parents would warn me that i am going to wake up the neighbours.

I remember all the friday nights when i would sit up late to watch the bruce lee movies which were aired on STAR movies as "Friday fury". My favourite book when i used to learn martial arts has always been "Zen in Martial Arts".

I used to quote in my job interviews that my goal is to go to the shoalin temple and learn kungfu. And the interviewers would shake their head and look at each other weirdly.

God knows how i became a chartered accountant. I did becoz i have to earn a living and my parents told me to do so. Now i am earning so fine. I can now pursue my dreams. I dont want to work for anyone. I want to do my own thing.

I dont know to sing or dance. All i know is i love martial arts and painting. Not that i have excelled in these. I love doing both of them. And now i love writing too. So that makes it three..there are three things i am really passionate about. And i am going to pursue all the three of them.

I searched and searched on google for a martial arts class in Bombay. I found one and i will be visiting them tommorrow. I hope they accept me as a student.

I cannot learn from anybody. I have tried that before it does not work. I need someone whom i can connect with. I am not learning martial arts to feed my ego. I am learning it to connect to my inner self. So i need someone whom i can relate to at a higher level.

I am so inspired reading the blogs of michael, phats, lonewolf, real-e. And i remember my convo with Mr X too who is a 5th Dan in Judo. All of this has motivated me massively and brought all my past memories back and i am all set to revamp my life now.

I hope this school is good, where i go tomm. I hope they will be 'willing' to teach me. I have a problem: My left arm has all these needle pricking marks. And there is a surgery done and i cannot have any one hit my left arm or i will be lying in a pool of blood as they have stiched my veins together. If you touch my left arm you can even feel the buzzing feeling of blood flowing...that is how sensitive it is.

Tomm when i meet the teachers i will have to tell them this. Do you think they will still accept me as a student? Oh god, i wish i did not have this kidney failure. At least i could have learnt martial arts. Where will i find at teacher who will be 'willing' to teach me?

But i will keep searching.

When the student is so ready
a teacher will approach her willingly..


Blogger Lone Wolf said...

you bring back good memories of my Kung Fu life. Any good teacher will be able to work around any difficulties you may have. Best wishes in persuing your dreams. Some people go to boost there ego(my original plan) but Kung Fu is what led me to practice Buddhism. Kung Fu helped me overcome anxeity problems I had and for me became more spiritual experience. I write about my martial arts experience soon.

11:37 PM, December 17, 2005  
Anonymous Gemini Girl said...

lolz at ur goal in resume! I mean, goal is great, but the interviewer's... yeah I can feel wot u've written abt their expressions. Well I had started karate classes in school, but the teacher called me a 'fairy'..... and from then, I dint feel like doing karate... urs a good thing.. it can mean so much to someones life! :)

12:05 AM, December 18, 2005  
Blogger anu said...

lonewolf - thanks lonewolf. i would be waiting to read your posts on your kungfu experience :)

girl - lol ... maybe you are really a i see those silvery white transparent wings ;-)

12:19 AM, December 18, 2005  
Blogger madhavan said...

i did martial arts for a little while way way back when i was all young and joyous but found it an exercise in masochism. likewise for pumping iron in gyms.

i think yoga is much much better for the kind of kick it gives to your energies. or vipassana meditation of SN Goenka, now that is one tough system but guaranteed results. or swimming which makes you come out so fresh as if someone has put oxygen into your blood.

but then every woman and man to her/his own passions...
and btw there's a way of working around that left arm...
try tai chi, which is half martial art and half meditation in motion. think there are some people who teach that in Mumbai, shouldnt be too difficult to find.

12:38 AM, December 18, 2005  
Blogger anu said...

Thanks madhavan :)mmm my left arm..i am looking at it right now.

God, how i wish i could help myself and heal myself.

1:00 AM, December 18, 2005  
Blogger madhavan said...

Lemme make a strong recommendation - try the Vipassana thingie. You will need to take ten days off and remain in silence and meditate at their retreat in a beautiful hill station called Igatpuri if you are nearabouts Mumbai. If you are located somewhere else, they have places all over India.

But do it. It's just phenomenal. And completely free. If you tell them about your kidney troubles, they will work out a solution as to how the 10-day course can be done and your treatment if there be any can continue too. It's not religious mumbo jumbo and harmless. Just a form of meditation. will give you details. Worth exploring. I will stake my reputation, which does not exist, on it

1:49 AM, December 18, 2005  
Blogger anu said...

Meditation is a good idea. Thank you Madhavan:) Maybe when i take my annual leave sometime early next year, i shall go there.

2:24 AM, December 18, 2005  
Blogger Real-E said...

Enjoying what you are doing is far more important than your level of proficientcy. If you enjoy something, hopefully you will continue and, as you continue, the rest will come. Base progress on you, not in comparison to others, and jsut keep on going!

9:08 PM, December 18, 2005  
Blogger Michael said...

Hi Anu,

Good luck in finding a teacher. Yes, it's very important to find one you can relate to.
As for your physical limitations, I wouldn't worry too much about them.
Because of surgery in August in which my breastbone was sawed in half, I wear a chest protector during sparring. My fellow students in the dojo are well-aware of this, so they're extra careful during sparring exercises. Of course, accidents can and do happen, but the chest protector affords quite a bit of physical (and mental) security and allows me to participate fully in all classes.
I'm sure there is a similar apparatus for your arm. If not, I think one can be improvised. It seems to me that a length of plastic or polyvinyl chloride tubing might come in handy to fashion a sort of "cuff" that can go over the area that needs to be protected.
Keep us posted on how things go!

9:17 PM, December 18, 2005  
Blogger anu said...

Real-e - Yup :) Thank you Real-e, i could not have got a better advice before begining my lessons in martial arts.

Michael - That is a great idea. I will check out or even get the material and figure out how to make it. Thank you Michael.

Hey Michael, i did find a teacher and i think they enjoyed meeting me too.

I will write in detail about it. I love details..when i am talking ;-)

11:01 PM, December 18, 2005  

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